Our House
by Edan Marie
Summary: Ryou, Bakura, Marik, Yami Marik and the Thief King live together, their antics driving each other up the wall as Ryou tries desperately to maintain control in the chaotic house.


AN: I don't own any of the characters in Yu-Gi-Oh!, which is the property of Kazuki Takahashi. Please review after reading! Rated M to be safe- lots of swearing and some sexual references.

"Ryou, I know you've got it. Just give it to me already!" Ryou glared at Yami Marik, who slouched with a familiar expression of unhappiness on his face.

"No! You got yourself into that situation; you can get yourself out." Ryou's tone was firm as he turned his attention back to the laptop screen. He had a History assignment due for the next day, and he knew he was unlikely to finish it on time. Living with four crazed teenagers was definitely having a negative impact on his grades- but Ryou refused to even consider going to after school sessions. It was hard enough keeping the house in one piece when he was there; who knew what would happen if he was gone for an hour? The idea worried him considerably.

"That's not fair!" Yami Marik's despairing whine broke through Ryou's concentration, and he turned to scowl at the Egyptian. The pleading eyes and childish pout just made Ryou even angrier.

"That's not fair? You've killed countless numbers of people no reason, and _this_ isn't fair? You've got no sense of perspective whatsoever!" The fact that Yami Marik simply laughed at Ryou's outburst enraged Ryou. He rose from the table, shoving his chair so hard the entire table rattled.

"Of course I don't, I'm a sociopath!" Yami Marik was laughing as though Ryou being angry was the most hilarious thing he'd ever seen, and Ryou could feel his blood beginning to boil. He opened his mouth to yell at Yami Marik, but was stopped by a low moan from the other room. He glanced towards the lounge, groaning when he saw the Thief King begin to stir from his deep sleep on the sofa. The man slept like the dead for about sixteen hours a day, and he was notorious in the house for his fits of rage whenever he was woken _"early"_- which meant any time before dinner. Ryou could already feel a headache coming on, and didn't want to have to endure another person's complaining.

"Great, you've gone and woken him up! Great job!" Ryou turned on Yami Marik bitterly, although he knew it was more likely to be his fault for shouting. But his temper was growing short, and he wasn't in the mood to be blamed for annoying the Thief King when Yami Marik had started it all.

"Ryou..." The Thief King was definitely waking up. He twisted uncomfortably on the sofa, the last vestiges of sleep still in him leaving him drowsy and only half awake. Ryou shook his head in exasperation.

"You just know how he's going to react to being woken before seven." Ryou was speaking half to himself, sighing resignedly as he watched the Thief King's eyes blink open once, then twice, and a soft, catlike yawn escaped his lips. The man rolled over to face Ryou, scraping a tan hand through his hair in a vain attempt to force it to lie flat.

"Ryou, why the hell are you talking to yourself?" Ryou's momentary relief that the Thief King wasn't furious at being woken was automatically replaced by indignation, and he shot the Thief King a fierce frown.

"I'm not!" Ryou cried, before harshly nudging Yami Marik with his foot. "I'm talking to this moron who thought it would be funny to handcuff himself to the back door!" At this, Yami Marik half stood so the Thief King could see him, awkwardly waving one hand with a smug grin plastered across his face. The Thief King simply sighed, raising his eyebrows at the crazy Egyptian.

"Again?"

Yami Marik's grin vanished as he glowered at Ryou, a meaningful look in his dark eyes.

"I told you, it was Bakura this time! Ryou, just give me the damn key!" The last sentence was spoken in a pleading whine that set both Ryou and the Thief King on edge, and Ryou snorted with derision at Yami Marik's request.

"What, so you can try and shag me again?" Ryou shook his head, taking several steps away from Yami Marik as though the mere suggestion if him being released would be enough to free him. He anxiously shook his head again.

"You can bloody well think again."

"Get your hands off my Rod, Bakura!" The outraged yell from upstairs startled Ryou, who quickly recovered enough to send an annoyed glance up at the ceiling. Yami Marik chuckled, sighing heavily.

"Bakura's gone and stolen the Millennium Rod again. Ra, Marik's going to murder him..." As Yami Marik spoke, the Thief King's eyes widened, and an embarrassed blush stained his cheeks. He reached into a pocket, tugging the Millennium Rod out as a playful smile teased his lips.

"Actually, the Millennium Rod's right here." The Thief King's proud tone faltered somewhat as his eyes flickered upwards, and bemusement replaced his satisfied smile. Yami Marik make a gagging sound, but Ryou simply felt bewildered.

"So... Which rod...?" Understanding dawned in Ryou's eyes as he followed the Thief King's gaze, and he shuddered as unwelcome thoughts crossed his mind. He opened his mouth to speak when suddenly Yami Marik jerked upright, straining to get closer with a shocked expression on his face.

"Holy shit, is that a condom on the Millennium Rod?" The Thief King's blush deepened, and his smile grew guiltier at Yami Marik's outraged tone. He nodded sheepishly, and Ryou sharply recoiled from him.

"Bakura! Why is there a condom on the Millennium Rod?' Before the Thief King could respond, Ryou spotted a familiar golden shape hidden within the folds of the Thief King's cloak. Without thinking, he snatched it out. It was the Millennium Ring. Ryou began to grow suspicious.

"And why the hell do you have my Millennium Ring?" This time, Ryou gave the Thief King time to answer, struggling not to put emphasis on the _'my'_ in his question. There was a constant struggle between the three Bakuras of the household as to who truly owned the Millennium Ring, and it had yet to be properly resolved. He could see the Thief King resented the use of _"my",_ but Ryou didn't have time to feel guilty. He needed an answer, and he needed one now.

"Um... Sennenshipping?" The Thief King tried with a bashful smile, and Ryou cringed, dropping the Millennium Ring and looking disgusted.

"Good Ra, you're disgusting, Bakura!" Ryou snapped, his tone sharp even as a shy smile threatened to break through his scowl at the Thief King's obvious embarrassment. Yami Marik, meanwhile, was still struggling to comprehend the Thief King's answer.

"I thought the other Bakura was bad, but you're something else! You're sick, you're... you're..." Yami Marik hesitated, trying and failing to think of a suitable adjective. Ryou rolled his eyes at Yami Marik, before warily stepping closer to the Thief King.

"Don't you have something else to be doing?" Ryou asked curiously, and the Thief King leered suggestively at him. He leaned forward, hands closing around Ryou's hips and making the younger boy squeak with alarm.

"That depends, are you free?" The Thief King's voice was soft and tempting, and Ryou bit back a protest as shock flooded his mind. His eyes widened and a rush of heat left his face burning scarlet as he tried to think of an appropriate reply. Alas, his mind remained hopelessly blank.

"What?" He eventually choked out, for lack of a better response. The Thief King opened his mouth to speak, only to close it again and jump in surprise as Yami Marik cackled triumphantly from the other room.

"Deranged! That's what you are!" Fitting though the word was, Ryou was in no mood to put up with Yami Marik's antics. The Thief King ignored him completely, yanking Ryou close so the boy fell into his lap. Ryou, already embarrassed, was flushed bright red now, and he stammered incoherently as he tried to regain his composure. He twisted his head to face Yami Marik, who had an expectant look on his face as if he was waiting for praise.

"We're past that, Marik!" He finally called, and Yami Marik looked briefly disappointed. Ryou swallowed nervously as he looked back at the Thief King, Yami Marik already forgotten.

"I repeat; what?" Ryou hated the anxious tremor in his voice as he spoke, knowing his worry was clear as day to the older boy. The Thief King leaned closer to him, a familiar teasing smirk on his face.

"There's another shipping I'm pretty keen to try..." He murmured, and Ryou stiffened abruptly. His eyes flickered towards Yami Marik, who was very obviously eavesdropping on their conversation, and Ryou sharply pulled away from the Thief King.

"I swear to Ra, if it's Deathshipping, I'm gonna-" Ryou's hurried protest was abruptly cut off when the Thief King touched one tan finger to Ryou's lips, silencing him instantly. The Thief King slowly lowered his hand and Ryou stayed quiet, his mind once again annoyingly empty. He only watched as the Thief King's smile widened, almost as though he was taunting Ryou.

"No, no." He gently tugged Ryou closer again, who didn't bother protesting this time. He was too curious to find out where the Thief King was going with this. He didn't need to wait long for an answer.

"I was talking about _Gem_shipping." Suddenly Ryou felt heat flood his body for an entirely new reason. Was the Thief King serious? Ryou studied his face carefully, searching for any sign that this was some kind of elaborate trick. The Thief King was constantly making passes at the other boys in the house, but he'd never really seemed to show any kind of interest in Ryou. What had changed his mind?

"Um... Bakura..." Ryou's voice was so shy he could barely make out his own words, and he forced himself to catch his breath. The Thief King didn't even acknowledge Ryou's pitiful attempt at speech, his hands tracing Ryou's sharp figure and curling in his snowy white hair as he considered his next words.

"There's a lot of fanart of us, did you know that?" The Thief King asked, his casual tone not giving anything away. Ryou shook his head, not daring to speak again for fear that he's only end up embarrassing himself again. The Thief King continued talking, his deep voice both matter of fact and unbearably tempting to Ryou.

"Most of it's pretty gentle..." The Thief King was leaning ever closer as he spoke, his lips just brushing Ryou's ear and sending a mostly unwelcome shiver down Ryou's spine. "But if you look hard enough, there's some really good stuff-" He paused for a moment, enjoying the barely noticeable catch in Ryou's breath as his hands lightly crept down his thighs.

"I wonder, how would it look in real life?" At this, Ryou's eyes widened even more, and although his mouth opened, no sound came out. The Thief King watched him for several seconds, deeply amused as Ryou fought to find something else to say. Luckily, Yami Marik saved him from making a fool out of himself.

"If you two are gonna start snogging, then get a room! It's bad enough having to listen to Bakura molesting Marik upstairs, I don't need to see you two kissing." Ryou couldn't help but smile at the sound of Yami Marik's rasping whine of a voice, secretly relieved. The Thief King was not to be put off however, eyes hungrily raking over Ryou's body as a playful gleam shone in his dark eyes.

"I think I'm going to have a lot of fun with Gemshipping..." The Thief King murmured appreciatively, and Yami Marik spluttered incoherently with outrage, eyes angrily narrowing.

"Oi! What about Sickleshipping?" He demanded, and the Thief King's smile turned thoughtful. His eyes flickered between Yami Marik and Ryou, the first male insulted and the second apprehensive.

"What do you get if you cross Gemshipping with Sickleshipping?" The Thief King's tone was musing, but his wistful smile betrayed his hope that someone would give him an encouraging answer.

The answer he did receive however has rather the opposite effect.

"The most disturbing three way I've ever heard of." The new voice startled Ryou so much that he leapt right out of the Thief King's lap, whirling to face the newcomer before regretting it instantly. Slouched against the open doorway was Marik, the fifth occupant of the house- Bakura- standing close behind him. Both boys looked rumpled and untidy, Bakura's smug grin contrasting sharply with Marik's bitter scowl. A quick glance lower down was enough to tell Ryou why Marik looked so pissed off. From the waist down he was stark naked, with angry red scratches and bite marks littering his bare legs. When Ryou's eyes flickered upwards and met Marik's, the boy looked even angrier, and Ryou quickly averted his gaze, a guilty blush staining his cheeks bright red.

"Marik, put some pants on! Jeez!" The Thief King shot Ryou a look that suggested he was overreacting a little, and Ryou glared right back at him. Marik simply sent Bakura a withering expression that, if looks could kill, would have sent Bakura straight into cardiac arrest.

"I can't. Bakura tore them all to pieces." All eyes turned to Bakura, who grinned proudly as though ripping up Marik's clothes was his greatest achievement. Yami Marik winked approvingly at Bakura, and Ryou gaped in disbelief.

"All of them?" Marik rolled his eyes at Ryou's horrified tone, nodding and sighing heavily.

"Every single pair." He eventually replied, crossing his arms and glaring at no one in particular. "How the hell am I supposed to go out now and seduce gorgeous women?" He demanded, throwing his arms into the air before freezing when a nasty snicker escaped Yami Marik's lips. He made no effort to disguise or stifle his laughter, a dangerous glimmer in his eyes.

"Ha! _You_, seducing a _woman_?" Yami Marik managed to choke out past his laughter, and Ryou didn't like the insinuating tone behind the words. Neither did Marik, who advanced a step towards his darker half.

"Like you could do any better, you psychopathic freak!" Marik practically yelled, but Yami Marik was unconcerned and tutted under his breath.

"Please, I could get anyone I wanted! I'm Marik Ishtar!" Marik flinched at the statement, before a mix of fury and undisguised loathing darkened his eyes and he strode towards Yami Marik.

"No, _I'm_ Marik Ishtar! You're just-" Marik broke off, shaking his head despairingly for a moment. When he looked at Yami Marik again, some of his anger was gone and had been replaced with disgust. "I don't even know what you are, you're just some freak who decided to steal my identity!" Bakura, who had silently followed Marik into the room- half resembling a lovesick puppy, Ryou thought- nervously touched a hand to Marik's shoulder. He could have been trying to calm him or restrain him, but either way Marik spun round looking ready to lash out.

"Marik, you're the one who created him in the first place!" Bakura's tactless words did nothing to sooth Marik, whose glare intensified as he shrugged off Bakura's hand.

"Not deliberately!" Marik turned to give Yami Marik a filthy look, who for once seemed to have enough sense not to make a nasty comment.

"Trust me, I'd _never_ have created him _intentionally_!" Although everyone- Yami Marik included- had always known this to be true, hearing it spoken was an entirely different matter, and it pained Ryou deeply to see the look of genuine, bewildered hurt that flashed across Yami Marik's face. It vanished a second later, but it was enough to let everyone in the house know that real damage had been done.

"I resent that!" Yami Marik snapped, and his defensive response only spurred the Thief King on. Ryou- and surprisingly Bakura too- shot the Thief King warning looks, but they were too slow.

"You resent everything! You're incapable of any other emotion!" The Thief King sneered from where he sat, and Yami Marik bristled threateningly at him.

"Will all of you just fucking stop it?" Four pairs of shocked eyes turned to Ryou, who fiercely shoved down the guilty feeling rising as he shouted. He was unused to shouting, but he'd kept these feelings bottled up for far too long, and there was no stopping him now.

"You guys spend every fucking day bitching at each other, and I'm always left picking up the pieces! None of you care at all if there's something I need to do- no, I'm just Ryou; the guy left doing everything for you and cleaning up after you every five minutes listening to your bickering! And I've had enough of it!" There was a heavy silence as Ryou stopped shouting, and he refused to meet anyone's eyes. He was not going to feel guilty for letting his thoughts be known. There would be no shame.

Bakura was the first to speak. Malice erased the surprise on his face, and the three words he spoke were laden with sarcasm.

"Jeez, sorry, _Mum_." In that instant, Ryou forgot about his own smothered guilt at his outburst, and he was momentarily consumed with thoughts of his own dead mother. Agony choked him, and the stark similarity of Bakura's eyes to his mother's only made the snide words cut much more deeply. Ryou's vision blurred with tears. Wordlessly, he ran from the room, slamming the door behind him so hard that it rattled in its frame for the several awkward minutes of silence that followed.

"Very fucking sensitive, Bakura." The Thief King spat acidly, and Bakura spluttered in a mix of surprise and indignation.

"What? He always acts like that, it's bizarre!" Bakura angrily defended himself, eyes darting around the room for support. He received none. Marik sighed and shook his head, feeling ashamed.

"He's the only person in Japan- possibly the world- who cares about the four of us. So you could try and treat him better." It was true. As far as the rest of the world was concerned, Bakura, Yami Marik and the Thief King didn't even exist. And for all Yugi's visits to the house, it was clear Marik meant little- if anything- to him. All the same, it stung Bakura to hear Marik say it. Ryou had been his host. Not Marik's.

"You've treated him far worse than I have!" Bakura accused, and the Thief King bolted upright, anger burning in his eyes.

"We've never been cruel enough to remind him of his mother like that. Or did you forget that she died when he was just a kid?" The Thief King's threatening tone hung in the air between them, but Bakura wasn't to be cowed. He especially wasn't going to let his past self scare him. He laughed disbelievingly and the Thief King's eyes narrowed.

"He's used that excuse twenty seven fucking times already! He needs to get a new excuse!" Bakura's own threat had the Thief King visibly bristling, but Marik cut in before he could respond.

"Excuse? You really have no heart at all!" Marik joined the attack on Bakura, who wasted no time in fighting back. He spun round to face the two watching Ishtars, jabbing a finger in Yami Marik's direction.

"Says the guy whose heart created a fucking monster!" Yami Marik, now enraged that the attack had been twisted in his direction, opened his mouth to retaliate but was abruptly stopped by the furious yell above his head.

"Just shut the fuck up already!" Ryou's voice was hoarse, an agonized sob cracking his voice and leaving the other four occupants of the house uncomfortably squirming as an unfamiliar feeling of shame left them all staring at the floor. Yami Marik sank to the floor, an apologetic looking Thief King crossing the room to awkwardly slouch next to him. Marik moved to the Thief King's abandoned sofa, preferring sleep over any kind of reconciliation with the other three. Bakura simply glanced up at the ceiling, his expression unreadable. Then, sighing heavily, he strode purposefully in the direction of the kitchen.

Upstairs, Ryou lay collapsed on his bed; tear streaked face hidden under the blankets as another sob shuddered through him. He hated the weak, helpless feeling that crying always brought with it, and the strength that had driven him to his outburst had disappeared. The five boys often argued, but it was rarely as bad as it had just been. So often, Ryou managed to take control of the fights, calm everyone down. And today he'd been the first one to lash out. Ryou wondered why he even let himself put up with the other four. Day after day, he had to do everything for them, and he was never once even acknowledged as having done so much. Not only that; looking after them all was obviously taking its toll on his grades, and people at school were beginning to notice. Yugi and his friends were even asking questions, and Ryou didn't know if he had the heart to lie to them anymore. It would be so easy to tell the truth. Yugi would help him, and he could finally be rid of Bakura, Yami Marik and the Thief King. Marik, he could deal with. The others, though? It was beginning to be too much for him.

But of course it would never be that easy. It was a complex relationship Ryou shared with the other four boys- a relationship he would most likely never fully understand, but a relationship nonetheless. Despite everything, Ryou couldn't deny the care he felt for each of them, and- although he knew they'd never outright confess to it- the growing care they had for him with each passing day. Maybe one day the five boys could actually be friends. There were a thousand different possibilities within their group. At the end of the day, every family had its troubles. And Ryou knew that if he ever got rid of three friends, not only would they never forgive him, but he'd never be able to forgive himself.

Besides, if he kicked the trio out, there was no doubting the chaos they'd cause throughout Domino City.

Ryou was roused from his thoughts by the smell of burning wafting up the stairs. _'Great,'_ he thought bitterly. _'I leave them alone, and what do they do? Bakura's most likely grown bored of Marik and shoved him in the oven.'_ Sighing resignedly, Ryou rolled over on the bed and glanced quickly at his bedside clock. The flashing red numbers informed him that he'd been upstairs for almost two hours. He'd been up here a lot longer than he'd thought. Hurrying now, Ryou jumped off the bed and all but ran down the stairs, already mentally calculating how much it would cost him to replace the oven. If Bakura had indeed decided to cook Marik alive- which wouldn't be the first time- Marik would have put up one hell of a fight, no doubt destroying half the kitchen in his struggle.

When Ryou entered the living room however, he realized he needn't have worried. Marik was dozing on the sofa, clutching the Millennium Rod protectively in both hands. At the sight, a soft, maternal smile teased Ryou's lips, and he let the shy expression linger when he looked to the other room and spotted the Thief King and Yami Marik deep in conversation. Or rather, the Thief King eagerly monologuing to Yami Marik, who had his mouth covered with tape. Ryou had to admit, a silenced Yami Marik was much more bearable than a regular Yami Marik. Ryou followed the source of the burning smell, noting with mild alarm the waves of black smoke beginning to pour out of the kitchen.

Inside the kitchen, Ryou found an uncharacteristically bashful Bakura leaning against the counter beside a charred plate of blackened, smoking meat. Ryou gingerly sniffed the air, struggling to place the scent.

"Is that... steak?" Ryou guessed, and before him, Bakura blushed and ducked his head. It was so unlike him that for a moment Ryou couldn't speak, too overcome with surprise to say a thing.

"I know you hate doing everything for us, and I know that stupid History assignment is important to you, so... this is one less thing you have to do for us today." Bakura' gruff voice did little to mask his embarrassment, and Ryou felt stupidly emotional from the gesture. Bakura wringed his hands, clearly uncomfortable.

"I'm sorry I was such an arsehole before." The apology touched Ryou even more, and he was left feeling astounded by the entire situation.

"Bakura... That's really-"

"Say sweet and I'll kill you." Bakura interrupted, a warning look in his eyes. Ryou laughed softly and, before he could help himself, leaned forward and gently touched his lips to Bakura's. The kiss was short, and very sweet, and when Ryou shyly pulled away, Bakura's expression was one of intense confusion and desire.

"Thank you." Ryou murmured, and Bakura grinned at him. He tugged Ryou closer to him, head dipped to kiss Ryou more deeply. Ryou's head reeled from the sensation, hands sinking into Bakura's velvet soft hair as a low moan slipped past his lips. Ryou knew there was no way he could ever kick anyone out of the house now. When he'd considered the possibilities within their group, he's mostly been thinking of what had happened earlier with the Thief King. It hadn't even occurred to him that Bakura might be interested in him- hell, he hadn't even known until now that he was interested in Bakura!

"You're welcome." Bakura whispered when he finally pulled away, and for a moment Ryou had to try and remember just why Bakura had said that. Remembering proved to be more difficult than Ryou had thought, since the hungry, predatory smile on Bakura's face was growing more distracting by the second. Eventually Ryou simply gave up on remembering and laughed again, arms wrapped around Bakura's waist in a warm embrace.

"You don't need to kiss me every time you speak to me, you know." Ryou informed Bakura casually, and in response Bakura simply gave him another dizzyingly soft kiss that left both of them breathless by the time it was over.

"I know...but I like it." Bakura told him casually, but his tone did little to hide from Ryou the sudden, shy uncertainty in his eyes. Of course this situation was entirely new to Ryou- but he'd never considered the possibility that it was new to Bakura. The vulnerability was quite unsettling to Ryou, considering Bakura was the least vulnerable person Ryou had ever met and probably would ever meet. Ryou opened his mouth- although what could he have said?- when, rather abruptly, the uncertainty vanished. Bakura's old arrogance was back, and Ryou wasn't sure whether to be relieved or disappointed.

"Besides, I'm still horny, and I've never fucked a virgin before." Bakura spoke matter-of-factly, and Ryou forced himself to shove aside his curiousity- was he really the only virgin in the house? - And ducked his head, strangely sad. Of course Bakura would focus any relationship on the physical side, and he'd be reluctant to show any emotion. Ryou couldn't have expected anything else.

"You're fantastic at spoiling the moment, Bakura." Ryou couldn't think of anything else to say, but Bakura didn't look insulted by his words. Instead, he winked playfully at Ryou, breaking free of his embrace and sauntering out of the room.

"It's what I was born to do!" Bakura called over his shoulder, and Ryou couldn't help but smile to himself. His eyes lingered on the doorway, almost expectantly. He knew precisely what was coming next, but for once he didn't mind.

"Hey, Marik, is that a condom I see on your Millennium Rod?" Bakura's teasing words rang clearly through the house, and the next thing Ryou heard was a yelp of alarm, followed by the thunderous sound of solid gold hitting the wall.

"Get the hell away from me, you limey pervert!" Marik screeched, and Ryou stifled a laugh. He sighed good-naturedly.

"...And, we're back to square one."

AN: I know that chapter was horribly OOC, and I do apologize for that. What's written so far of Chapter 2 is a little better. I've had this idea for months now, and I knew I couldn't leave it unwritten. I hope you enjoyed it, and please review!


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